haunted

my past is haunted me. the more stories i try to dig in to find the truth the more confuse it makes me.who should i trust. does this past few years im trusting the right person to lead my life or this past few years i only make myself worst by trusting the wrong person so badly.

i dont know who to trust anymore.they claim to be my best buddy, my best mate, my best man or woman or even my best of the best relationship that i ever had but why the fact that i found out today wasnt as pleased as i thought before.

i really dont want to judge people because once i start it i really tear me apart. like it will give me thousands of reasons to hate everyone or even thinking of sweet revenge. im not an angel, or good ppl, so i dunt have the right reason to judge ppl based on my stupid foolishness from my past.

well, my past is haunted me. claim that everything happen in my past is because of the GOD listed it that way.how lame the excuses would be.talking bout im the reason for making other ppl suffer.dont they know that this 5 years im not happy too.im struggle to find my own path, n im not ever near the success.i choose the hard part rather that the easy way that i have before.

why wouldnt the past dissapear.why should it haunted me.i nearly forget about it.i nearly choose my own target of life.i nearly fulfill what i should from the start. but why after this 5 years, the past is haunted me over and over again.

yes i regret..
yes i hate you..
yes i dunt want you..
yes i dun want to noe about you
but why must you look upon me talking like im changing a lots.
why ? do you happy that im suffered all this while..

god im begging you please let me live my life.i dun want to end it with full of regret.
i wish that the life i want today would be the life that would be bless by everybody.
i hope that the man i choose right now is the man that will care about me more than everything
that will not hurt me and take good care of me..
let the past walk away from my life.
forever.